HOME SWEET HOME

Lately, I have been bombarded with multiple incidents... more of consequences of decisions. It was part of life, we make mistakes, we learnt. We got to know people around us & can make more accurate judgement on people & events. Changes are one scary thing.

Hall

Anyway, I moved in to my new apartment. Its small but its cozy, its rather heavy on my budget but its mine, & its my sanctuary. Its okay, I'll manage somehow. 

I "employ" a pair of sibling to take care of it when I'm off to work. Although not much help, but they are enough.

The left picture is the hall area, the dining table hasn't arrive yet & the curtain is half way through.

Kitchen

On the right, is the kitchen, this is how it looks like before I put the grill and glass window. Perhaps will update the latest pictures on my house next time.

Anyway, the sink is still the same one. So many thing I wish I can do in the apartment, but of course there's always cash constraint.

By the way, I haven't tried the swimming pool. Its still remain a mystery...

Master Bedroom

The master bedroom is rather spacious. If ever I got extra budget to do renovation, I'll renovate this part of the apartment first.

Interior is basically the same thing. Just I added the grill and the glass window in the backyard. Tiger & Snow seems to enjoy the veranda a lot. Maybe they felt the cramp inside. 











Enjoying Night View

Snow

Tiger

The satisfaction of having your own place is beyond words. I wish I can tell everyone I knew to get a home of their own first thing in life. 

Finally I have a place of my own. Finally I can really say, "Home Sweet Home". 

Alhamdulillah.

HiKAT TRANSRAYA CBL 2012 - 14 ~ 17 SEPT 2012

HiKAT TRANSRAYA CBL 2012 - 14 SEPT @ VIA BUS @ HENTIAN PUTRA (LRT)GOMBAK @ 12MLM

Public Event · By Hikmah Kembara Adventure Team (HiKAT)

14~17 September 2012

I was so anxious and a bit excited to yet another challenging rendezvous for the second time to Lata Lansir. Situated in the brink of Dungun district in Terengganu state, Hutan Lipur Chemerong is really a catch for any quest thirst jungle trekkers. By right the track is not for the first timer or un-fit trekkers but you’ll find many of sort. 

Location statistic:

State	Terengganu
Location	32 km from the Inner Highway Kuantan-K. Terengganu
Coordinates and map	N 4° 39.60' E 103° 0.05'
Water Source	River
Waterfall Profile	Near Vertical Fall
Accessibility	Recreation Park

Refer to: http://trekkerz.blogspot.com/2011/07/trans-cemerong-berembun-langsir-cbl.html

Our group consists of 46 participants from all over the place. There are some UMP (Universiti Malaysia Pahang) students. List of participants;

1 Wan Muhd Muhsin Wan Mazlan (Organizer-Sweeper)
2 Ilzam Wahyu Bt Hj Mohamad
3 Nur Fadhilah Bt Mohd Azlin
4 Afizafir Bin Burhanuddin
5 Mohd Azwan Bin Mohd Nasir
6 Mohd Shah Abdul Rahman
7 Anas faris b mohd yusoff (Organizer)
8 Ahmad Safwan
9 Razzuwan Razali
10 Syaza syafiqah binti muhamad kamel
11 muhammad izzat bin ad'nan
12 Shahrizal Zamri
13 Mohd nizam ahmad
14 nurul hani kamarudin
15 Fatimah sabrina moahmmad
16 Noor Azlia Fatin Binti Fauzi
17 Khalilah salwa ismail
18 Ahmad Najib Habeb
19 Mohd Fazre Said
20 Mohd Fairuz Bin Ahmad
21 Muhammad fadli bin mohamad
22 Siti Nur Suhadah Binti Said
23 Raja Nurfarhana bt Raja Razalli
24 Ahmad Fathi B Abd Malik
25 Ahmad Saifuddin b Jamaluddin
26 Muhammad Fazrul bin Nor Izuddin
27 Noor Hasnieda binti Hassan
28 Mohd Heiry Bin Mohd Noh
29 Hasrizal Haron
30 Suhaida Mohamed
31 Siti Azura binti Zainon
32 Davy Jones
33 Mr.Z
34 Zulia Zulkifli
35 Lynn Zulkifli
36 Kaerol Akmal
37 Mr.Y
38 Mr.X
39 Suzie
40 Hermansah (Organizer - runner)
41 Nur Shuhada
42 Aniseh
43 Mohd Rais (Organizer - Gogo)
44 Tobleromania Dee
45. Heller
46. Muhd Nadzrin

The organizer decided to go by bus, it was more enjoyable for me at least, and less tiring. The road starting from the highway to the target location was rather narrow & holes-everywhere, though it wasn’t curvy much. Although its just 32 km from the highway but we reached there after an hour and 15 minutes. Roughly.

After a brief exercise and quick instructions we depart at 11.30 am. Normally, the organizer will divide the group to smaller groups according to their fitness level and functions. That day we have 4 groups;

• ·         Runner / guider >> So called the fastest and function to set up our camp
• ·         Mid section  >> Moderately fast
• ·         Sweeper  >> Picking up the late comers
• ·         Last sweeper  >> Final pick-up

Our group pass by these trail;

First day;

Chemerong Waterfall à Kem Balak à Kem Y

Second Day;

Kem Y  à Taman Bonsai à Puncak Berembun (1108m) à Lata Lansir à Sungai Bangang à Puncak Chemerong à Seraya Besar à Kem Y

Note: Jeram Orkid was skipped.

Third Day @ Last Day;

Kem Y à Kem Balak à Chemerong Waterfall

The trek

The trail is quite challenging specially in the beginning. One hill we need to climb was called “Bukit Taubat” (Repent Hill) where I personally felt repenting. The good thing is there’s very less leeches. It is advisable to wear a trekking sandal rather than a hiking boots because there are few rivers we have to cross and the trail is not too dangerous. Although, always stay in a group as the trail is home to tigers & boars, specially going down through Sg. Bangang to Seraya Besar. We had lunch at Kem Balak and continue our journey to Kem Y rather breezy. Kem Y was a occupied by our group and another from Maybank that night. Our gogo decided to camp at Kem Y due to congestion at Lata Lansir and there are 2 sick persons.

Next day we hike to Lata Lansir with lighter bags, because we are coming back down to Kem Y for the night. I felt excited as the picture of Taman Bonsai becoming more vivid in my mind. Nearing the Berembun peak, the flora was grown with lushes of bonsai trees that crafted the scenic environment. We can’t help ourselves from keeping  the view in our cameras. Finally at a height of 1108 meters we reached Puncak Berembun. Reaching Lata Lansir is now a just  a quick ½ hour descend on a steep & rocky slope. We reached Kolam Puteri just before noon. Its just a 50 meters walk to Lata Lansir.

 As expected it was congested with other groups looking for a hideaway from the hustle bustle of the city. Being a second timer to Lata Lansir, it can never be a bore to me. But there used to be a tree springing out towards the Kolam Puteri slide, but now its lifeless with just its empty branches left. I brought 2 friends (Wan & Shah) to the “Secret Garden” as I name it to reminisce my previous visit. It still remain the same. After taking some group pictures we head down to Kem Y about 2 pm.

   

Going down we’ll pass by Sungai Bangang (Dumb River J) on the way, crossing puncak Chemerong all the way to the Seraya Besar, which is actually a name of a tree, Seraya. This is the trail we need to be extra careful with as it is known to be the place where the tigers roam about. In spite of its lousy name, Sg Bangang really a very nice rive pool. Again, we need to take off our shoes to cross the river and continue hike up.

After that, nothing is too interesting apart from the same Taman Bonsai replica on the way. Our journey back was accompany with a drizzle of rain that cools down our patience due to excessive hiking. Nearing Kem Y, I was becoming mentally fatigued and starts to grumble many other silly stuff. It was a big relief when we finally hear the voices of our group from the camp. I am thankful to my hike gang, Heiry and Wan for just being there. We were greet by the most delicious smell on earth, food. Well, when you are hungry everything is super delicious. J

The next day after group photo we hike down to civilizations remembering all the sweetest memories of CBL.

The whole bunch J

~:: Failure is when you stop trying ::~

finding the logic of relationship

Life as we know it, very fragile. This includes relationships. Relationship is like magnetic fields. Only reconnects when the contradiction matched. Yap, it RE-connects, because they both were disconnected sometime ago. Its like when you are running in a big circle, seems like you are leaving the starting point behind, but actually you are getting closer to the end point which is the starting point. Its practically the rule of the universe, where everything have its own axis, and axis always have circular properties. Even our life is circular (usually). We get up in the morning, brush, wash, etc, go to work, spend our income, (then got finished), and sleep. The routine repeats again in a circle.

Its a rare occasion when we immediately develop fondness towards someone or something. It is feromonial. Does looks counts? Yes indeed. Really depends on one's perception towards colors, contras, structure, & fine details. Some people feel happy only by sitting by the sea shore, surrounded by familiar and expected structure, some people like the look of certain lamp post or simply the traffic lights, and some other people like the unexplored region which haven't been stored in their mind set. Talking about mind set, what it has to do with it? actually a lot. Let see the diagram below;

Why is it that a person can have a blissful conversation with certain people? What is the factor initiating this interest? Blissful conversation in this context means where both party feel honestly calm/excited & happy during the course where you don't have to be defensive, mugging, insecure or cocky about a topic. This includes acceptance of sarcasm or simply feels total relaxation even without talking. This can be perceived in few perspectives such as mutual trust, mutual fondness, likeness, & conversation momentum.

In another discussion, what is the derivative particle that triggers anger? It is general understanding that if you want to solve a problem you need to nail the source of the problem. Not just know what it is, we need to understand it and figure out the solution. In this case, anger as we know it feels warm. Your blood starts to boil from inside out, and your face become red. In other words, your heart starts to pound faster and your blood vessels gets extra load all too fast and too much; hence, the intense body heat. Its the time your brain receive the warning signal and instruct your heart to pound faster and other respective actions follow. The best & fastest solution? Wash yourself cool. They are many other ways, depends on one's preferences. We need to admit that human are designed to be different to one another. For example, one can find composure in a cup of ice-cream, or listening to his/her favorite music. The thing is we can't simply make our heart to beat faster or slower. Its not like when you see a cake, you can move your hand and grab it or you smile even when your emotion is telling you otherwise. These are thing we can literally control. But our heart is a very fragile organ, hence our feelings and feelings construct relationships. Nonetheless, its the most powerful organ in our body that embodies our behavior as human.

Its when the body can't (more of choose not to) cool off the anger and keep it aside (pending in your unconscious personal mind) in ember. This collected ember will eventually become vengeance if it is left unattended. Un-noticeably, one (person A) create a persona to his/her imagination towards someone, let say person B, or anyone particularly similar to person B. It mostly hard-coded in one's brain. This is the initial value person A assign to the persona belonging to person B, at every first meeting unless person A decide to overrides the initial persona. Let say person A decide to update the persona, hence in every meeting his/her mind starts to overwrites the old values until at one point it become a preferred values for person B's persona and finally become permanent. It's not impossible to change one's perception towards you but in order for person B to achieve this (apart from working on it), person A must choose to let go. Its a paradigm shift for both person A & B.

Anybody can mock any persona. Imagine a guy, wearing a decent or saintly attires. So you met this guy first time and start to construct his persona in your mind. This process requires stored memories on that particular subject. In this case the attributes are perhaps;

• - Gender {male;female}
• - First time meeting? {yes;no}
• - Attire {smart;messy;fancy;average;good;bad}
• - Clean {yes;no}
• - Geeky? {yes;no}
• - Look {pretty;average;ugly}
• - Aura {cheerful;solemn;serious;pious;evil}

The answer in the curly braces really depends on one's experience on what that perceived on that particular moment. Now, your mind is answering these questions intuitively according on what you know (first);

• - Gender {male}
• - First time meeting? {yes}
• - Attire {smart;average;good}
• - Clean {yes}
• - Geeky? {yes}
• - Look {average}
• - Stature {lower;similar;higher}
• - Aura {serious;pious}

Secondly, you'll consider deeper than what you see. Only then you start to staple the persona, and hard code it bit by bit. I like to demonstrate it in a more graphical way;

Anyway, human mind and body are much more complex than this trivial depiction. Do not take it seriously. =)

Its genetic to human mind that priority will go to the things they most prefer. When these attributes are assigned with the values one like, so as one's acceptance. Its very difficult to have a person to willingly accept someone with the non-preferred values. They can only do it on second thoughts, or perhaps third, fourth, and so on. The question is, why this is happening? Simply because, in one's existing imaginative mine and intuition, certain persona can only tally with certain attributes. It is against with his/her belief & ego if somebody tell them otherwise. Perhaps when someone come and tell you the above guy is an abusive husband, its highly unlikely you'll accept willingly. This does takes all your might and gathered memories to compile the solid remark you masked on certain person.

This perhaps needs more elaboration. Will see to that soon.



~~~
Human mind is without boundary. Exploring them is the best utilization.
By the way, its just my two cents.

Last but not least, I'd like to credit three thinkers;
David Neagle
James
Carl Jung

My Grandpa

I like listening to my uncle's story telling session, which happens during family get together. Once he foretold a reminiscence of my late grandfather's God-forsaken experience during the Japanese occupational period in Malaysia (previously Malaya). He make it sounds so realistic (to the listener) with his exaggerated talks & spirited emotions. My uncle started, in one fine day, while my grandpa was doing his common teenage routine, he was suddenly became captive by the Japanese to built the "Death Railway". Remember the story of River Kwai? That was it. The objective was to build a strategic railway built between Siam (Thailand) and Burma (Myanmar) to improve communications to support large Japanese army in Burma. Stretching 415 km covering 60 stations connecting Tha Rua Noi (Thailand) to Thanbyuzayat (Burma), the construction has taken more than 200,000 forced labour during the WW2. Most of then died due to disease and starvation. My grandpa was around 14 of age then. He was sent to Siam, and the misery begins.

I don't know exact details during his capture. But he was gone for 3 years. Continuing his session, my uncle said, my grandpa saw sickly people worked to their bones building the railway. Labours don't have enough food to eat and there were limited medical supplies. The route was untouched forest and dangerous with wild fauna, and being in Equator, it always rains, hence making the construction more excruciating. The scene of seeing live people but too sick to work being thrown into a big dig hole, was common... eventually will be buried together with the dead ones... scary.. But my grandpa was not a faint heart. He planned an escape. His first attempt was half success. He seek help in one of the houses in nearby village, but finally the owner turned him off to the Japanese soldiers. Being more cautious the second time, he looked for a Malay family. This time, his instinct doesn't fails him. His second attempt was a success. Sorry though, I forgot exactly what escape scheme he did back then. It has been quite some time since I heard this story from my uncle. But faintly, I think he mentioned about my grandpa disguising as dead and being thrown into the dig hole and at night, he crawl out from the hole and escape.

He was infected by malaria disease, dehydration, and fatigue. But he was cured by the house owner using traditional remedies. Amazingly his health was restored just by the use of plants and roots from the forest and the malaria was gone. He managed to continue his escape to a fishing village. He doesn't even know he is still in Siam or already passed the border. But my best guess, he must already reached Kelantan. For 2 years, he stayed there working as fisherman until one day he dreamt about his mother calling for him while sleeping by the boat and he had a big feeling that he must head home. Coincidently, the Malayan started the search for "forced labour" survivors and founded my grandpa. They are finally gathered and sent back to their hometown. It was then my grandpa met his new baby brother. Maybe his dream was a revelation from God. After few years, he joined the United Malay Army, we called as Askar Persekutuan Tanah Melayu. He even joined the coronation of Queen Elizabeth in London, because as one of the Commonwealth countries, we were invited for the grand parade during the event. He took a long 3 months journey by ship just to reach there.

While I was reading some article about the "Death Railway", I came across a website (Reff) noting the 3 must see places if you ever visit Kanchanaburi province in Thailand, that is, 1st : JEARTH War Museum, 2nd : "The River Kwai Bridge" and 3rd: ‘The Hellfire Pass’ which one of the last stretch of an amazing railway, bordering the Burma.

My grandpa was seen as an excellent candidate for son-in-law because he was in the army. I can imagine that also as I looked into his old pictures. He has a very fair complexion, clean-shaved face, with army hair cut, broad shoulders and with good height, he was looking so grand in his army uniform, any young girls will definitely fall for him. The match was an arranged marriage of course back then with my grandmother. She was a pretty petite girl, very fair, and was the talk of the village boys. So the match was set between them. My grandma, being a family of a sub-royalty (suku Biduanda of Negeri Sembilan), hence the marriage took place for 7 days, 7 nights. Wow... nobody did that nowadays, I think. Well, my grandma was 16 when she got married, and they are blessed with 7 children (the 2nd one died from yellow fever). My grandpa died about 4/5 years back. But he was loved much by family members. Although he's gone senile the last year, we had fun though, because he asked for bizzare things. For example, he wants to send letters to the Agong. Hmm.. so confused. Neway, we had good laugh then!



Reff;

http://ikandugong.multiply.com/photos/album/23/Landasan_Keretapi_Maut-Kanchanaburi-13_Sept_07

http://www.roll-of-honour.org.uk/Cemeteries/Thanbyuzayat_War_Cemetery/html/thailand_-_burma_railway.htm

Dats life!

I came back late from office today. So damn tiring, driving all through Nilai <-> Uptown every single working day. Then, here I am, feeling as tired as ever, feeling exhausted with life. Not sure why i did that to myself. Right now, just lying on my bed with Goscinny & Uderzo's masterpiece, Asterix series. Particularly, Asterix and the cauldron. Life is good after that! It's a wonder how good reading can change our mood 180 degrees. Next, will be my favorite Korean anime, 'Bride of the Water God'. Yeah, I am a really big fan of comics, video games, and cats. I started since the third generation (the earliest possible years though) , the Nintendo of course. My favourite would be the Contra & Ice Climber... :)

Today's training was gud, sincerely the trainer was an experienced one. Easily reflected through. And there's a really tall guy sitting next to me, ignoring my presence. Hmm.... just towards the end of the session I borrowed his charger. That's all. Right now, I am having big issue with my VPN... darn.. I am not feeling like going to office tomorrow. What went wrong there..???

My cats are happily jumping, sleeping, later eat anytime, anywhere. Looks so good. Rather then getting stuck with networking problems. Then, my sister's fren video is playing on her PC. She's playing the 'A little pain' by Olivia Lufkin on Yamaha vertical piano. Really talented girl. Yeah, its best to start piano lesson as early as 3, rather than 10... not good, I know because I have direct experience. Anyway, better something than nothing. Right... as per my quote below.


~:: Failure is when you stop trying ::~

Memoirs of a mother...

Tiba-tiba malam tadi aku teringat kat arwah mak aku. Hari-hari terakhir aku dengan dia, mesra sangat. Aku pegi Seremban dengan mama and papa, just the three of us. Bukannya buat ape pun, pegi beli lampu dan kain langsir untuk bilik aku. Terasa cam budak mengada for the first time in my life. Then, cari cat pasal nak kaler bilik aku. Aku dengan mama pun pegi la kedai cat tu, betul2 sebelah kedai Ah Kheong mekanik tuh. Aku pun pilih le kaler yang sesuai (konon2nyer hahaha) Ingatkan nak kaler bilik pink tapi guna kaler deep red campur warna putih sket. Sekali time nak cat tu aku dengan mama terkejut pasal kaler tu jadi merah sangat. Tergelak besar kitaorang. So, tu pasal la kelar bilik aku tu merah bangat... hihi Aku pun habiskan kaler bilik aku tu dengan mak aku. Nak buat camner, dah beli dah cat tu... mahal pulak. Takkan nak buang je.

Ada satu pagi tu aku terbangun awal... hahha... aku kan suka tido. So pagi tu kira magic ler aku bangun awal.. kul 6.45 pagi. Actually, itu adalah hari2 terakhir before mama pegi umrah. Time kuar bilik tu aku nampak mak aku mengaji kat hall bawah sensorang. Ape lak mimpi mak aku mengaji kat sini sensorang nih? Aku dok terpikir, tapi aku pegi le kat dia and dok kat sofa sebelah dia. Tapi sofa tu kan empuk je... membuai2 aku untuk tido balik... hehe. Aku pun lay down kat sofa tu... tapi sesuatu membuatkan aku tak dapat tido balik. Suara mak aku mengaji tu terngiang-ngiang dalam telinga aku time tu. Dia mengaji biasa aje... takde terror sangat. Tapi itu adalah saat2 yang aku tak dapat lupe sampai mati. Then malam before dia nak bertolak ke Tanah Suci tu, semua orang datang umah. Nenek, makcik2, dan pakcik2 aku datang. Pehtu tetiba dia mintak tengok aku nyer album gambar. So dengan tak semena2 album aku tu femes lak malam tu. Tetiba aku dapat attention yang selama ni aku tak penah dapat. Semua orang dok cerita pasal aku.... hihi.. segan pulak.

Buta betul time tu, tak nampak2 lagi yang mak aku tu sebnarnya nak "pergi" dah. Esok tu, aku tolong dia packing. Time tu dia mengadu sakit dada, apsal ntah... dia kata dada dia sejuk. So dia mintak sweater yang dia kait tu kat aku. Aku simpan je, tak pakai... bukannya sejuk sangat kat Mesia. Tapi then dia tak bawak pulak. Dia tu sempat buat sambal ikan bilis and klu tak silap aku dia buat rendang pucuk ubi tu jugak. Yang aku ingat, sambal ikan bilis dia aritu pedas lain macam. Aku pun bungkuskanlah bekal2 tu kasik kat dia dalam bekas plastik, ntah nape aku rasa excited lak. Gilo apo. Then mak aku kasi aku cellphone dia suruh aku jaga while dia pegi sana. Dia kasi aku kain sutera sulam warna hijau pekat yang dia simpan2 selama ni kat aku. Sebelum tu pun dia bawak aku dengan Nani pegi Nagoya beli kain. Kain tu sumer kain yang aku nak beli sebelum nih tapi dia tak kasi. Just time tu dia belikan sumer. Ish, kenapa la aku tak perasan..? Aku still simpan kain2 tu... tak tau nak buat ape. Dah nak dekat 5 tahun dah.

10 Nov. 2002
Akhirnyer, time to go to airport. Dia dok la berjalan2 keliling KLIA tu, interview orang2 yang kerja situ (macam biasa) sampai penat la jugak aku ikut. Nenek aku yang sakit tu pun datang airport nak hantar dia. Tak ingat datuk aku ade ke tak. Then masa dia nak bertolak tu, dia cium tangan nenek aku and nenek aku cium pipi dia. Tetibe aku rasa sebak, baru sekarang aku paham, itulah first time dia rasa kasih sayang seorang mak. Maybe. Hanya aku, dia dan Allah je paham. Masa dia turun escalator tu dengan my papa, dia dok lambai2 siap flying kiss, ala2 Miss Universe la pulak. Aku tetibe sebak dengan tak semena2, then nangis pulak.... orang tua2 kata, klu orang nak pegi tempat jauh, orang yang hantar tu jangan menangis. Nanti orang yang pegi tu tak balik. Then ternyata petua orang2 tua tu jadi kenyataan. Beberapa hari lepas tu, we all terima berita mama meninggal kat Mekah. Tanggal 15 November 2002, hari Jumaat, dia pergi meninggalkan seorang suami dan 4 orang anak yang sungguh blur ketika itu. Ayah aku kat sana agak terkial2 pasal tiba2 isteri kesayangan dia dah takde.

Hakikatnya kat sini, tak banyak aku tau pasal mak aku dan vice versa. Cuma, mak aku tu seorang yang sangat baik hati, pemaaf, dan suka tolong orang. Dia bukan ahli dakwah, bukan ustazah, bukan orang alim. Cuma seorang yang biasa, mengaji pun biasa, semayang pun biasa, dan beramal pun biasa. Tapi Allah ambil dia sewaktu dia kat Mekah, hari Jumaat lak tu. Hanya Muslim je paham hal ni. Sebagai pedoman untuk kita yang masih hidup ni, Allah tak pandang berapa banyak orang tu semayang, mengaji... kalau orang tu busuk hati, tak suka tolong orang, hasad dengki. Acap kali kita jumpa orang camni, pakai macam org alim la konon tapi mengumpat ngalahkan pondan. Aku rasa bersalah kat mak aku, pasal aku bukan nyer anak pompuan idaman dia. Nakal sangat... mulut laser... tak bersopan santun... dan macam2 lagi la... Ayah aku kata, walaupun mak aku tu suka membebel, itu tak betul ini tak betul... tapi dialah seorang isteri yang taat setia.

Owh, sebelum aku terlupe. Nama arwah mak aku tu Hajjah Fuziah binti Haji Abdul Hamid. Salam.

ape aku buat ni?

Aku merasakan kehidupanku agak terlambat...namun hakikatnya...perjalanan hidup aku ni jauh lagi...kalau nyawa aku panjang la....dalam kekacauan otakku yang memang la bersepah nih, aku terfikir, aku nak tahu jugak sedara mara aku kat indon...tapi tak tau la daerah mane...aku memang orang Jawa tulen...arwah atok aku memang asal sana...Mak aku je Melayu...tapi kalau nak ikutkan salah silah moyang belah mak...asalnyer orang Minangkabau, nun ha dari Pagar Ruyung. Keluarga mak aku suku Biduanda. Kira indon la jugak, so aku nih indon ke sebnarnyer? haha
Aku banyak mem'photostate' rupa bapak aku yg samar2 je kaler nyer...hehe... mak, sebenarnya arwah mak aku ni putih melepak orangnyer... ade la kaler cam ain kawan aku tuh... adek pompuan aku ikut rupa dia... sikit pun takde rupa bapak aku... haha... kalau pegi mana2 dengan bapak aku, sumer tak caye tu anak dia...aku teringat perkara yang sama berlaku kat aku masa aku keluar dengan mak aku...huhu...sedey... diaorg siap tanya..."Ni anak sape nih?" ...mak aih....
Bile fikir2 balik, rasanye takde la teruk sangat hidup aku nih...well, banyak sangat orang yg lebih teruk.. rasa kita je teruk pasal tak penah jumpa orang tu life...selalu nampak kat sotkaba, TV, radio...and all... aku akan cuba meneruskan hidup aku ni sebaik mungkin...aku selalu doa kat Allah supaya aku dapat bersatu dengan keluarga aku kat alam lain...bukan kat alam fana ni aje... rindu betul dengan mak aku...banyak lagi perkara yang perlu aku perbaiki untuk sampai tahap mak aku tu...
Petang 17 Ogos 2005, pukul 1600, tok ngaji aku, merangkap atok sedara ku telah kembali ke rahmatullah...terkejut jugak la...terkilan pun ade jugak pasal tak sempat jenguk dia kat hospital sehingga la dia koma... dah baca yassin kat dia petang semalam... sian kat makcik aku yg dijadualkan menikah hujung minggu nih. Semoga Allah merahmati rohnya...Agaknyer bleh la jadik ketua kampung kat tempat arwah mak aku..hehe
Masa...sebnarnya kita tak sibuk pun...saja buat2 sibuk...dengan hal duniawi yang selalunyer tak penting dan relevant. Kita ade masa untuk ape2 pun, just the means of making the time for that purposeful moment... dan bagaimana kita meletakkan kepentingan sesuatu perkara...contohnya, aku rasa exam + assignment + project tu sebagai perkara kritikal... lalu meletakkan perkara atok sedara aku sakit masuk hospital tu second dalam senarai. Lalu aku pun tak pegi tgk atok sedara aku kat hospital. Lepas tu tgk2, quiz+assignment+project aku tu bukannyer hebat sangat pun....dan sekarang aku rasa nyesal...aku tak melihatnya dengan hati.... nyesal skrg pun tak guna kan? Aku doa aku takkan buat pilihan yang macam ni lagi...amin...dan pada sape2 yang baca posting nih, harap bolehla sama2 amik iktibar...sebnarnya aku boleh buat masa untuk jenguk atok sedara aku kat hospital...alfatihah...

blurft!!!

At last!!! My own personal blog...duh~~